Lesbian and gays in Vietnam are not threatened by strangers on the streets but from their very own families, an expert said.
A lesbian couple want to protect their child from prejudice
At a conference on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) peoples’ rights on May 10, head of Institute for Studies of Society, Economy and Environment (iSEE) Le Quang Binh said Vietnam has about 1.6 million LBGT people and only few of them have come out and been accepted.
"95% of gay people said they were treated with disdain when people knew about their preferences. 20% lost friends and 15% lost families or were beaten." Binh said. "However, the problem is many families have sent their child to mental hospitals and several hospitals have even accepted these cases. Due to huge pressure, gay people chose to marry but their later lives have been unhappy. Personally, I think those 'fake' marriages are more of a violation than same-sex marriages."
A parent in District 9, HCM City shared her story that she practically disowned her son when he came out during his second year at university. She and her husband then brought him to hospital for blood tests and diseases but doctor said he was healthy.
They even brought him to mental hospital in Bien Hoa City and told the hospital to put him into female ward. They proceeded on exorcising him to no avail but from that time, the mother realised that she could not do anything but accepting.
"Actually, now I don't understand why I was so disgusted with him. I destroyed half of his life and made him mentally unstable. He has to take medicine for the rest of his life." she said. She now actively participates in many activities to protect LGBT groups.
Prejudice in school also put huge pressure on gay teens, with a suicide rate for students who are not accepted in school, nine times higher than normal.
Nguyen Thu Nam, an official from Health Strategy and Policy Institute said by legalising same-sex marriage, gay people would feel more secured and responsible to their lives and society. It also can reduce the transmission of STDs.
In addition, parents of gay people will be more at ease when their children can have a family like other people.
A lesbian couple in HCM City said they are raising a five year old kid but still feel very threatened by social prejudice. "We are happy but what is normal for us is abnormal for others. I'm afraid for my kid, for how society will look at her when she grows older, how will school friends and neighbours treat her. I hope she will have normal experiences." the mother said.